“I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well.” -Psalm 139:14
Emotionally one of the hardest experiences of extended singleness is the realisation that I may never have children of my own (I’ll probably talk about this more in future posts). But here is an even more important realisation: how God has wired me as a woman with the qualities of mothering does not begin or end with biological motherhood. It shows up in daily interactions with others, because caring for, protecting, and nurturing is a way of approaching and investing in the people around me. Right now (and maybe not ever) God hasn’t called me to be a mom but he has called me to take care of those around me, and that’s most recently been applied to an indefinite season of caretaking for my mom.
So many of the skills and different “hats” normally associated with being a wife and mom are all a part of my daily juggling act (while also holding a full-time job).
And just so no one misunderstands my heart, I so deeply respect mothers and I know that my experience of caretaking, while having similarities, is also different from raising a child. Both are hard in unique ways; however, I both are pictures of “mothering.” Motherhood is a wider road than I ever realized as a young woman – it be caretaking, fostering, being an aunt, taking care of a family in need, mentoring – and there are so many single women who are expressing motherly love and care for those around them.
Remembering this doesn’t diminish the distinction and honor of the women who are called to motherhood. It reminds me to look beyond what feels like emptiness and remember that God has created me, equipped me, and strengthened me to serve others (including future generations) in both specific and meaningful ways as a single/childless woman. This applies to ALL single women who desire to be mothers, but may never be.
